RIGHT OKAY SO I WAS TALKING TO MY 5 YEAR OLD COUSIN ON SKYPE ABOUT HALF AN HOUR AGO AND SHE LEFT FOR A LITTLE WHILE TO GO DO SOMETHING AND DIDN’T WANT ME TO BE LONELY, SO SHE LEFT HER PET FURBY (SHE CALLS IT “LULU”) ON A CHAIR TO “TALK” TO ME FOR A WHILE
SO I ROLL WITH IT AND JUST KIND OF BUM AROUND FOR A MINUTE WAITING FOR HER TO GET BACK WHEN SUDDENLY A NOISE THAT SOUNDS LIKE SATAN’S ASSHOLE FARTING OUT A METALLICA SOLO COMES OUT OF THE SPEAKERS, WHILE AT THE SAME TIME LULU DECIDES TO START LAUGHING FOR A GOOD 20 SECONDS NON-STOP IN A HIGH PITCHED SCREECH
AND THEN MY COUSIN WALKED BACK IN AND EVERYTHING JUST IMMEDIATELY HALTED
NOT SURE IF I SHOULD INFORM SOMEONE THAT SHE’S PROBABLY LIVING WITH A HELL DEMON DISGUISED IN A PLUSHY PINK PACKAGE JUST WAITING TO DEVOUR THE SOULS OF THE LIVING
dont forget the part where you pretend you’re having a really sad moment in the rain
And the period shower where you stand and watch the blood flowing down the drain as if you just got back from a war or brawl.
As a girl I can confirm that all of this happens.
Yes it does.
It really does
the penis people’s showers are so boring compared to this
Funniest blog on earth
current emotion: 20% battery
2011 - 2013
i will never not reblog this post
Are we going to talk about this or what?
More than 28.000 notes. i’m crying
this is perfect.
😭😭😭😭😭 it’s here again!!!
THE NOTES THOUGH
we are a restaurant
dont you HATE it when this happens